EIGHT: Brad and Angie- Yes, this week at the NFP, we’re bringing you the babes of Brad Pitt — the guy who always had his pick of Hollywood’s finest — and whose new movie, “Inglourious Basterds,” is in theaters. And why not start with his current live-in, Angelina Jolie, who looks to have more tats than Allen Iverson. Nice.
SEVEN: Favre’s “Schism”- I’ll be honest, when the report broke Thursday that there was a “schism” in the Vikings locker room, I went to the Internet to find the true meaning of what was going on inside the team’s facility. And when I found out that the word can apply to one’s separation from the church, I knew I had seen it all. A “schism” in a locker room full of dudes? Give me a break.
SIX: Brandon Strikes Again- According to reports, Broncos WR Brandon Marshall was held out of practice yesterday — as a form of punishment. But he supposedly told reporters that he isn’t trying to force a trade. Of course you aren’t, guy. So then, Marshall — a pro football player — is being sent to a “timeout” like my four-year-old niece? But, now that he is suspended, he really got what he needed.
FIVE: Brad and Claire- Claire Forlani isn’t the mainstream babe we all think about when Brad Pitt and his women come to mind, but she might just be that hidden gem that you’d expect to find at the NFP. Plus, she happens to be the favorite “Pitt Girl” of the Daily Jolt’s own Ray Gustini. And we all know that goes a long way in this day and age.
FOUR: Simeon is Back- Simeon Rice — yes, the same guy who played college ball at Illinois in the early 1990s — is back in pro football. But the big comeback isn’t happening in the NFL, folks. No, Rice is heading to New York to play for the Sentinels of the UFL. Hey, I went to my nephew’s peewee practice last night. Can I play, too?
THREE: More Vikes- Speaking of the big “schism” in Minnesota, I’m starting to question who these players are in the Vikings locker room who want Taravris Jackson to start? That’s like asking for Castle Grayskull for Christmas and getting punched in the face by Santa instead. Bad call, guys.
TWO: Unhappy Lion- New Lions defensive coordinator Gunther Cunningham isn’t very happy these days in Detroit — especially after the team’s first two preseason games. He told reporters, “If you can’t tackle, you can’t play defense.” That’s right, coach, and that’s why the Lions are, well, the Lions. They haven’t played defense since the ‘90s.
ONE: Brad and Jen- We saved the best for last because that’s just what Jennifer Aniston is here at the NFP. In her second “Eight in the Box” appearance, Jen gives us a look in her favorite NASCAR jeans shorts — and we couldn’t be happier to have her back gracing our site. Life is good today for NFP Fantasy expert Joe Fortenbaugh, folks.
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The Cubs were booed off the field at Wrigley yesterday against the Nats. Summer is over in Chicago, folks. He Gone.
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Brad looks like he is doing OK.... minus the 72 kids he has hanging on him.
Marshall is a tool... suspend him for the whole season. Go the UFL bud.
Matt, the other day you were saying you understood the resentment at Favre from some players, comparing it to Brunell replacing Pat Ramsey. Now you're saying they must be crazy. Did you guys on the Skins warm up to Brunell that quickly too?
How about taking on the real issue straight up? Would the Vikes have been better signing Vick instead of Favre?
Jen, call me!!
OK, lets start with the important stuff (football). Parsing whether Favre's arrival is a "schism" not
doesn't really matter. Sorry, Matt, but I subject my high school students (usually sophomores) to the word. Yes, it does mean a split among religious groups, starting with the split between the Christian Church between Roman Catholic and Eastern Orthodox. However, the word had become more commonly used to indicate a split between devout groups (and I believe football players are definitely a devout group, though not a religious groups, except to their fans).
Personally, if Favre divides the Vikings locker room (schism or not), great!. I'm a diehard born and raised Cheesehead, and would welcone any distraction to a division rival. After all, the Packers put up with the Favre "Hamlet act" for years.
Finally, and least important, I can't believe you published a picture of Angelina Jolie that makes her look undesirable, if not repulsive. At least to me.
Matt I can't believe that you just went Castle Grayskull on us. Nice work.
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12:29 PM
Whoa Jen....
Cub is brutal. Time for Cutler and the Bear!