APJulia Stiles is everyone's ex-girlfriend.
Any boy who doesn’t go off to college secretly hoping to fall in love with Julia Stiles is a liar. She’s the promise of higher education, a unique one-of-a-kind beauty who somehow manages to be ubiquitous on college campuses. There she is, painting faces before the football game, arguing about Josh Ritter at an outdoor house party, sunning on the quad with a book of Flannery O’Connor stories. You’ll spend the next four years living in those first glances. It won’t be true love — only an idiot expects to marry his freshman year sweetheart. Consider it a lesson in life from the one that got away.
Oh, and they will get away. That’s probably why Julia Stiles isn’t the biggest movie star on the planet. She’s got the looks, the pedigree and the versatility -- she just reminds too many guys of girls they used to date. Watching her strings just a bit too much. It’s the girl nobody knew how to love, projected on a 60-foot screen kissing Liev Schreiber. You’re not jealous, just wistful. As an actress, Julia Stiles is at her best when she takes you out of the reality of her movies. She makes you sit up straight, grab hold of your date’s hand in the popcorn bucket and silently promise to do the most that is possible with the time that remains.
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"Julia Stiles is everyone's ex-girlfriend."
Damning with feint praise, that's almost as unpleasant as being called pleasant.
Maybe you guys could forward John Mayer's retraction about Jessica Simpson.
--Of Simpson, he talked about her sexual ability, and said: "That girl, for me, is a drug ... That girl is like crack cocaine to me." --
If you could forward to fark.com, maybe he was really talking about Marge Simpson....
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Oct 12, 2009
10:11 AM
Julia Stiles is a troll .